Page 21 - LOTN Spring Issue 49 2022

EDUCATION AND FORMATION

O where can I go from your spirit,
or where can I flee from your face?
If I climb the heavens, you are there.
If I lie in the grave, you are there.

The God Who Sees

BY EILEEN CLARE GRANT

O LORD, you search me and you know me.
You know my resting and my rising;
you discern my purpose from afar.
You mark when I walk or lie down;
All my ways lie open before you (Ps 138/9).

t can be a scary feeling, knowing that someone can
see into the depths of our being and discern all our
thoughts and feelings, good and bad. Perhaps this
Ithought reminds us of when we were children, being
puzzled but aware that our parents knew what we were up
to, even when they couldn’t physically see us. Or, in our
adult years, we may feel a little paranoid from time to time,
wondering if we are being spied upon when we’re online or
on social media; or acutely aware that the skies are filled
with spy satellites observing us on everything from Google
Earth to the CIA. I remember being a bit uncomfortable
when my son in New Zealand was sure he’d seen me on
Google Earth, waiting for the bus outside our village, even
though my face was blurred. I thought at the time, How
dare they spy on me!
The Psalmist sounds as if he too had his uncomfortable
moments, knowing that his God could see him wherever he
went – and not just see him but see right into his heart’s core. "Hagar and the Angel" by James Eckford Lauder ,1857 (Royal
In his time, “the heart” didn’t just mean the physical organ but Scottish Academy of Art)
referred to the very depth of our whole being. As the Catechism
says, “The heart … is the place ‘to which I withdraw’ … our acceptance and security, acceptance and tranquillity:
hidden centre … only the Spirit of God can fathom the human
heart and know it fully … it is the place of encounter” (¶2563), I thank you for the wonder of my being,
for the wonders of all your creation.
encounter with God. In this psalm, the Psalmist works through
how he feels about what might seem to be an enormous
intrusion into his life – “Where can I go,” he demands, to In the Old Testament, we come across many instances of
escape this ever-present scrutiny. It doesn’t matter; wherever he God gazing into the hearts of His created beings. In the Book
is, God is always there, with him, within him. “Too wonderful of Genesis, poor forsaken Hagar, cast out of the only home
she knows, because of a jealous wife’s insecurity, hides in the
for me, this knowledge, too high, beyond my reach.” And so he
gradually comes to an understanding of why this is, the why of wilderness, fearing for her life. She hears the angel of God
this most intimate of relationships, formed even before he was addressing her, giving her courage and hope for the future. And
conceived: in amazement she calls on God as El-Roi, that is, “Thou art the
God who sees.” God read her fear of an uncertain future in her
heart and answered her unspoken plea, promising her a future
For it was you who created my being,
knit me together in my mother’s womb. for herself and a great future for her child.
Later in the history of Israel, disappointed in his anointed
king Saul, God sends Samuel to Jesse, to seek out the successor
And therefore, annoyance, fear, discomfort give way to
God has already chosen. Samuel, being human, is ready to pick
one of Jesse’s handsome older sons, but God tells him “Do not
look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I

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